Why it sucks

The WrestleMania times have been leaked. God how do I hate the WWE. You can't even keep the basics under wraps. If you want to see it. Look below.

* Chris Jericho vs. Fandango has been given 10 minutes
* Kane and Daniel Bryan vs. Dolph Ziggler and Big E Langston has been given 12 to 15 minutes
* Ryback vs. Mark Henry has been given 12 minutes
* The Shield vs. Randy Orton, Big Show and Sheamus has been given 15 minutes
* CM Punk vs. The Undertaker has been given 20 minutes
* Jack Swagger vs. Alberto Del Rio has been given 15 minutes
* Triple H vs. Brock Lesnar has been given 20 to 30 minutes
* The Rock vs. John Cena has been given 25 to 30 minutes
* A Diddy musical performance has been given 8 minutes
* The WWE Hall of Famers coming out to wave to fans has been given 7 minutes
* The show opener and National Anthem has been given 7 minutes
* Other assorted segments throughout the show have been given 10 minutes

The longest three matches all involve part time talent. One match is all part time talent (and the second longest match on the card). Why build talent when we can just remind people of guys that used to be here, but now are just using Mania for a good pay day.

Also P-Diddy is getting about the same time as Chris Jericho. That makes sense. Mother fucker.

Anyone catch The Ultimate Fighter this week? Uriah Hall has a better build as character than most new WWE characters (Shield excluded, but that might be more the talents doing than the writers).

Still not sold on buying this show. Might be my first missed Mania in a decade.

It's not me, it's you.

Normally I don't post when life just gets hectic. I am now working from home and taking care of a 3 month old. That would be enough of an excuse as to why nothing new has appeared here. If that was the truth.

The truth is I haven't watched wrestling in three weeks. I know, we're almost upon WrestleMania! The thing is, I don't really miss wrestling. The WWE hasn't put out a solid product in years. Every once and awhile they do something right but lately that ratio has been way out of wack.

If the WWE doesn't give a shit about me, and would rather cater to a demographic somewhere between MTV's Buckwild and that stupid humor of that fat British chick from the Chelsea Lately show (who isn't funny, but I believe mentally handicapped), then I say I don't give a shit about them.

I don't know if I'll order WrestleMania. I just don't see the sense in plopping down 60 dollars to see out comes I already know and a WWE champion that misses three straight weeks to promote his movie. Here is what 11 PM this Sunday will look like: Undertaker streak continues, John Cena is the WWE champion, and the semi-retired CEO will beat the legit former UFC champion.

There might be a surprise or two thrown in, but the big stuff. The stuff that shapes the WWE going forward. That stuff will be the same old same old. The WWE learned a long time ago, it easier to change nothing and accept the fans who won't leave than to try hard and chase the fans that have left.

I think I might be part of the latter now. When the clock strikes 6 on Sunday, I'll make up my mind. If that was today, I wouldn't be watching WrestleMania. I'll spend my money on Sonnen vs. Jones. It has a better storyline.

Monday Night RAW: Powerbombs and Piledrivers and Hurricanranas, Oh My!

Buckle up Dorthy, this isn’t Kansas anymore, it’s the road to WrestleMania! Lately when I have been really excited for an episode of Monday Night RAW I am usually cursing my television by 9:30. I could do the same with this episode because it had its head scratching moments. For one, this is the second Monday Night RAW in February where the WWE champion didn’t even bother to show up. And no, recap clips don’t count. Come on Dwayne, you’re better than this.

Why the WWE dusted off that old video of John Cena and JBL from when WWE went Hollywood I don’t know. I get that the Oscars were last night, but is your go to footage a few weeks before WrestleMania a video from 8 years ago. A silver lining is it did make me realize that John Cena has won 10 WWE titles in less than 8 years. CM Punk held his last reign for over a full year (Cena did have a year run, but who really talks about it. That’s sad). This means tonight’s main event is truly a battle of quality vs. quantity.

CM Punk’s two WWE title reigns are both more memorable than all 10 of John Cena’s reigns put together. The first being the infamous Vegas promo and the Chicago title win that ignited a national fever dubbed “The Summer of Punk”.  The second was a win with less fanfare but resulted in the longest title run since Hulk Hogan in the 80’s when the WWF was running wild. Both are signature achievements in the WWE history books while John’s runs as champ are mere footnotes.  He did get to make 12 rounds, so that’s special.

I could bitch about a lot but if the WWE gives me two segments like the opening and the main event, then I’ll happily shut my trap. That was probably the hottest start to Monday Night RAW in 2013. I can hate on Vince McMahon but the man is a top tier worker. Paul Heyman is no slouch either. The two are always must watch TV.

Brock and HHH stole the show with an amazing brawl and Lesnar took one hell of a hard way gash. With the WWE cutting back on blood during matches, it really stands out as something special when it happens; even if it is by accident. I think Lesnar looks scarier when his face is covered in his own blood. That dude is fierce as in if we both ended up in a jail cell together then I would just accept the fact that I’m his wife.

That opening had the place going nuts and would be hard to follow. That is why the WWE has guys like Dolph Ziggler to handle such sticky situation. Poor Dolph can’t even get a TV entrance, which is an insult cause the guy made Ryback look like a million dollars. You can tell that the months working with Punk have helped develop Ryback. He and Ziggler had a good match to get things started on RAW. I know some don’t enjoy the circus around Dolph but I think AJ and Big E add a lot to his persona. I say add more people to the mix. What is David Otunga doing?

The CM Punk promo wasn’t his best. It actually felt out of place on the show. It did serve two purposes. One is that it hyped the main event for later. That is always good, and something the WWE tends to skip over. The second is that it began his build towards believing himself a “god”. He is calling himself immortal and legendary. Who else could say that? I bet it is the same guy who is undefeated at WrestleMania. My fingers are crossed.

They inducted Donald Trump into the Hall of Fame. I think it is kind of fitting that he goes in around the same time that the WWE is doing a crazy right wing nut character. Will Trump ask Del Rio for his birth certificate? I don’t have an issue with him being the celebrity inductee. It’s in New York and Trump is a symbol of New York like rats, urine filled subways, and the Jets.

Mark Henry beats up Khali. I approve of this. It was short. It was sweet. It helped push Henry as the biggest baddest dude in the WWE. It’s simple and I like simple. Plus it keeps Khali from trying to wrestle, which benefits us all.

It looks like Jack Swagger won’t be suspended. The WWE Wellness Policy is a joke. Again I will state that this runs parallel with the McMahon life motto of, “Money over morality”. Remember kids don’t do drugs, unless you’re making us rich. In that case, roll a fatty and go make some Youtube videos with the dwarf from Lord of the Rings.

I liked the Miz TV segment. If the Dallas crowd wasn’t a total waste then that would have gotten a bigger reaction. Uncle Zeb is a great character. Jack Swagger is truly taking a back seat to him. It works because Swagger is a better second fiddle than a leader. Alberto Del Rio came off strong and held his own against Wilford Brimley (diabetes). This will pay off down the line because one of the arenas is going to have a lively crowd that will give these men the reaction they deserve. Given New York’s strong relationship with this country’s immigrant population, I would say that WrestleMania should be an interesting crowd.

They sure as hell put the duo of Zeb and Swagger on TV a lot tonight. They got a long segment, a tease on the all-important WWE app, a match with Miz, and some video promo time. I don’t mind it because this whole thing is going to take a few cracks with the bat to get established. I will say that every time I see the videos from Zeb’s basement all I can think to myself is, “Johnny Lawrence grew up and left the Cobra Kai dojo to join a militia led by Gwildor from He-Man”.

It’s Old School RAW next week. The WWE then gave us a match straight out of the 80’s with Cesaro vs. Orton. Or should I say Nikita Koloff vs. Jake “The Snake” Roberts. Another fun match as both men work really well with each other. Cesaro does what mid-card champs do and jobs to Orton. No shame it that, just wish it didn’t happen so often.

Sheamus likes movies. He makes fun of Wade Barrett. Wade gets cocky. It is a simple build to what should be a good feud. Still confused because I thought Sheamus also was feuding with the Shield. I guess he can take on four men at once. He probably will and win. It’s not a far stretch when the tag champs beat the former #1 contenders blind folded with an arm tied behind their backs. 

The Prime Time Players are finished. I don’t care if they tag together until 2020, they are finished. You can’t take a team serious that just lost to a blind folded one armed team. That is literally losing an ass kicking contest to a one legged man. Darren Young should start filling out applications at Home Depot, his future is bleak.

R-Truth and Rhodes was a backdrop to Sandow setting up a future singles match. They are getting closer to a Rhodes Scholars reunion. The announcers try to insinuate that Rhodes and Sandow are more than friends. Billy and Chuck are jealous. It should be a good low-card tag feud for both teams. Not much more I can say about this.

Dean Ambrose is clearly the breakout star of the Shield. Seth Rollins is getting better every week, and this was clearly his best promo, but Ambrose has it all. In baseball they would call him a five tool prospect. It would seem the WWE is setting up another WWE All Stars vs. The Shield match for WrestleMania. I think Orton is on that team. I would even say Chris Jericho too. Maybe Ryback is the third. All in all I am enjoying their run so far, but it could get stale unless The Shield moves beyond flavor-of-the-month six man tags.

The Miz wrestled Jack Swagger. They had a good match. Both men can bring it in the ring. Swagger and Colter are starting to gain momentum with the fans. The WWE again tries to bait the right wing media by name dropping Ann Coulter. This match established how deadly the Patriot Lock is as a finisher. The next few weeks should be interesting. I don’t see Swagger losing much going into Mania. He needs to look almost unbeatable.

John Cena did a promo. He now cuts a promo the way a 5 year old tries to tell a story. It is usually all over the place with tons of misplaced energy. His parents shouldn’t let him have sugar so late on a school night. At least he mentioned his match coming up unlike some current WWE champions had forgotten to do two weeks ago. (7 minutes without mentioning the Elimination Chamber, come on Dwayne!)

If John Cena and CM Punk want to put on matches like that then screw the Rock. He can stay home for WrestleMania. That was probably the best match Monday Night RAW has seen since Jeff Hardy vs. The Undertaker in a ladder match. I would pay to see them wrestle one more time. It is that damn good. The last ten minutes of the match was as close to perfect as I’ve seen.

I liked that they showed Cena pulling out new tricks to beat Punk. At first Punk would counter his usual move set like the double shoulder tackle. He even countered the STFU. That is when the first banned move came into play. Always fun to watch the announcers squirm when somebody uses a crippler crossface. Chris Benoit would have been proud. John Cena also debuts his Powerbomb, and I hope he keeps it in his arsenal. It looked really good.

Then CM Punk pulls his own banned move and does the Piledriver 80’s style. Word is Vince McMahon blew his top when that happened because the move has been outlawed for years. Goes to show how much Punk and Cena not only trust each other, but understand their value in the company. It’s not like they’re going to get suspended. The crowd lost it for such a basic maneuver. It is dangerous, and can cripple, but this match was the kind of match where you push the line a bit. Kudos to both men for going beyond the limit.

Again the end was classic. It’ll be hard for any Mania match to top that last ten minutes. They told an epic story that neither man’s best was going to be enough to beat the other. They went at it like Apollo and Balboa by trading haymaker type move after haymaker type move. They should issue this match at wrestling schools as a requirement for graduation.

You can criticize Cena’s hurricanrana all you want. It was sloppy, but when a man his size does that move, it is impressive just to see it. Also he should thank Punk for protecting him during the move as he kept Cena from getting lawn darted in the middle of the ring. With that performance, John Cena deserves to be going to WrestleMania; I hope the Rock remembers to show up too.

There were some holes in this week’s episode but the good by far outweighed the bad. I’ll take that every single week with a smile on my face. I’m geeked to watch Main Event and Smackdown this week. I can’t wait for next Monday.

I want to know where CM Punk is going from here. I want more of Brock vs. HHH. I want to see how Uncle Zeb and Jack Swagger continue to grow. I want to find out what the Shield will do next, and if Orton will pay for his RKO. I also want the WWE champion to appear. That is a lot of wants.
Until next week, you can't always get what you want but if you try sometimes, well you might find you get what you need. This week I wanted the Rock, the Undertaker, and Jack Swagger suspended. I must have needed CM Punk vs. John Cena. Needs are always better than wants.

Plus I got to make three different Uncle Zeb look-a-like jokes. Dude must make a killing at the carnival running the mustache rides. And I’m out…

Armchair Booker: When Taker Met Punk

Earlier this week I talked about the state of the WWE creative team and how Vince McMahon is fed up with the current direction of the WWE writers. I laid out a loose plan for how to fix what is broken. My keystone idea being that the WrestleMania 29 main event should be the Undertaker vs. CM Punk for the WWE title in a streak vs. streak match. With that in mind you can book the rest of your year to build toward that pinnacle point. I said I would go deeper into this idea, and share some of my booking beliefs that I used in starting two different regional wrestling television shows, both highly rated in their timeslots, and a series of nationally distributed DVDs. Let’s dive in.

CM Punk is the hottest talent on the WWE roster today. John Cena is the most established. There is a difference. Cena has a very loyal fan base, but CM Punk has a constantly expanding fan base. Not all of these people are supporters of Punk, but more people are putting eyes on Punk than Cena these days. Even the high brass at Comic Con said that Punk was a better draw for them this year than Cena had been in the past. Be it to cheer for him, or to watch him get beat up, more people are opening their wallets to see CM Punk. That is why he is the WWE champion, and that is why he needs to be at the top of the WrestleMania 29 bill.

The Undertaker is the hottest talent in WWE history. He can stay away from the WWE for months, and with a toll of his bell, the fans are rabid to see him walk the aisle. He might be the greatest persona in pro wrestling history, dating back to the original carnival days. His undefeated streak at WrestleMania makes him a top draw each year. People want to see what is going to happen next, and at 20+ years, they don’t know which match is his last. This built in hype, and near god-like status, makes the Undertaker a necessity for the main event at WrestleMania 29. He’s a draw by just walking out the curtain, and that’s a great foundation to build on.

The two also have a small history. It’s only a few minutes on the CM Punk “Best in the World” DVD, but it was Undertaker vs. Punk for the world title after Summer Slam that cemented the disrespect the WWE brain trust had for Punk. They took a hot talent coming out of a sizzling feud, and fed him to the phenom. On the DVD they state that Taker had no respect for Punk going into their program, but over time that changed. It’s a great starting point given the current “No Respect” card being played by CM Punk. The standard bearer of the WWE is the only man left standing in the way of CM Punk getting the respect he believes that he deserves. The kind of respect that can’t be denied after beating the Undertaker at WrestleMania.

This is one of the many drawing factors for this match. There is the streak vs. streak dynamic. The Undertaker is 20-0. That is something in the current WWE that will never happen again. To get a talent that stays with the WWE for over two decades, and a creative team that handles that talent correctly the entire time, you’d have a higher success rate betting on Tammy Sytch staying out of prison. This will never happen again. Never. The uniqueness of the situation is another draw in itself. It’s like watching a comet that flies by the earth every millennium. It will never happen again during our life time. Things like this make money in any medium.

CM Punk is also doing something that will never happen again. He’s closing in on one year as WWE champion. That is something that doesn’t happen in the era of fans that have a train of thought only 140 characters long. By WrestleMania 29, he’ll be closing in on 18 months. It’s another unheard of situation that on its own draws people in. There will be fans who tune in because they don’t know when and if CM Punk is going to end the longest title reign since Hulk Hogan’s 1474 days between 1984-88. That’s before The Undertaker was lacing up his boots as “Mean” Mark Callous in WCW (1989). It’s a big deal.

As I stated earlier this week, it creates an unstoppable force vs. immovable object type of situation. Fans will tune in because they know something historic is going to happen. Neither looks to be giving ground, but one has to end. The mystery of the unknown has always been the best way to attract fans in pro wrestling, even more now in the “know-it-all” era. Add this dynamic to the draw both CM Punk and The Undertaker on their own have, and this angle has the steam to drive WrestleMania sales to record levels.

Just because you have the angle doesn’t mean you’re going to be a success.  Two things have to happen. The build to the match has to be good and the match has to deliver. You can’t promise prime rib, and give the fans tube steak.

The build on this match needs to be drawn out from the first RAW after the Royal Rumble up to WrestleMania 29. The Rock and Punk are fighting at the Rumble. No need to play the Undertaker card until after that takes place. Rock vs. Punk is going to be a good draw on its own, and will play an important role in setting the table for Mania. This is the match that is supposed to get Punk his respect. Beating the Rock is going to change everything for him. Spoiler alert: It doesn’t.

Punk beats Rock, but it doesn’t fill the hole in his ego. There isn’t a red carpet when he walks through the arena door. The locker room isn’t kissing his feet as he strolls through the back. Vince McMahon isn’t his personal ball washer. What does CM Punk have to do?

Cue the Undertaker.

Each year the Royal Rumble winner selects which title he is going to challenge for. Usually the winner comes out at the end of RAW and him haws between the World title and the WWE title. Whomever the winner is plays up the crowd, tilting to both sides, until eventually narrowing in on one champion. I would start with this.

The winner comes out and before he can start the Undertaker interrupts. He comes down and lays out that it doesn’t matter who he wants to pick. This year the Rumble winner will be facing the World champion because the Undertaker wants CM Punk and the WWE title. If you’ve got a baby face winner then he does the noble thing, tips his hat to the Taker, and leaves the ring. If you’ve got a heel winner, then he gets tossed out on his ass, and runs to the back with tail between legs. It gets established early than the Undertaker has that kind of clout and aura to bend things to his will. He’s the true King shit in the WWE universe.

Cue CM Punk.

The two meet in the ring. Punk talks respect. Taker lets him know respect is only earned by going to hell and back. They jab at each other for a few minutes. Finally a deal is made with the devil, only hang up is which guy is the Devil? The stakes are high for both, and the buzz begins.

Now you’ve got roughly 9 weeks to build this match up. The Undertaker stays protected. He’ll make appearances here and there for a promo or a vignette, but he isn’t wrestling. You save that for Mania. Punk can carry this feud on TV. He’ll even prove he’s better than the Undertaker by beating those victims of “The Streak”.

The next few weeks on RAW, a former WrestleMania opponent of the Undertaker gets rolled out to be taken down by CM Punk. Do the low hanging fruit first with the older legends like Snuka, Jake Roberts, or Sid that the WWE can send out for a cheap one night pop. Then move into the active roster opponents by having him face all the old opponents in an elimination chamber. That would be Kane, Orton, Tensai, Mark Henry, and Big Show. When Punk comes out champion, he can claim he beat five of Takers “victims” in one night. It also fills the required need for an Elimination Chamber match before Mania.

Finally the homestretch leading up to Mania is Punk being confronted by HHH, HBK, Nash, and Flair. He can run all four men down. He can talk about doing what they couldn’t. He has held the WWE title longer than any of them. Now he’s going to end the streak that claimed their careers. Its four weeks of dueling promos that should help build up the intensity of this match. The last two weeks then are spent drawing both the Undertaker and CM Punk into a collision course, with the closing moments being a face to face showdown filled with pipe bombs and near blows. They shouldn’t physically get involved, just tease it. Both men need to leave the ring with their head held high exuding the confidence that come Sunday they’ll have their hand raised.

The actual match is where the true magic and shock happens. First I would start the match entrances at 9:30 PM. The earlier start will have the smart fans wondering what is going on. They’ll believe that there is something big coming. It’s just too early to begin the main event.

The two will then wrestle for sixty minutes. It’s the kind of match the current WWE audience has never seen. Punk, if you’ve followed his career, is a master at the sixty minute match. He understands the pacing and how to protect somebody like the Undertaker, whose age can limit him. For an entire hour the two go to war. They pull out all the stops with false finishes, brawls outside the ring, etc. Then the bell rings to signify that time has expired. The match is a draw. Punk keeps his title, and The Undertaker is still undefeated. The fight doesn’t stop though.

As the bell rings they keep trading blows. The ref tries to pull them apart, and he’s laid out. They continue to fight all over the place because to them only one man is walking out tonight. More officials and security try to stop it, and they’re laid out too. For a good ten minutes Taker and Punk either fight each other or those trying to get between them. Finally the two fight on to the main stage trading big blow after big blow. Each man trying to finish the other with one big shot, their bodies broken and bloody. Then in the end, on their knees, they trade fists, chops, and head-butts. Finally, leaning on each other tossing noodle fists with both gas tanks empty, Taker and Punk collapse next to each other laid out on the main stage.

As WrestleMania ends officials, paramedics, and staff surround the two as double stretchers are wheeled out. Both men being checked on and eventually wheeled out as Punk holds a thumbs up in the air. He didn’t beat the Undertaker at WrestleMania, but he did something nobody has ever done. He survived him.

People will tune in the next night. Sure there will be fans that don’t like a draw finish, but it’s the one thing the WWE can do to protect the Taker’s streak, and pass the torch to the next generation before it is too late. It’s something nobody will see coming, and a moment that will cement the legacy of both men like what happened for Hogan and Andre at WM3.

You keep both men off RAW the next night to sell the brutality. The next week you promote the appearance of Punk the following week on RAW. Finally on the third RAW after Mania, you have Punk come out to address the fall out. This can lead to a new feud or it can start planting the seeds for their rematch at WrestleMania 30, probably both.

No matter what, if this was to happen it would always be remembered as the night Taker met Punk.

Armchair Booker: It’s All About WrestleMania

I haven’t really been in the wrestling loop the past few weeks. I even took a break from the internet for the weekend. Sometimes it is nice to be hold up in a spot that doesn’t even have cell phone reception. It lets you clear out your head, which is highly recommended at least once a year. Like an oil change for the brain. Then I came back Tuesday and waded back into technology. The first thing I saw was about CM Punk back fisting a fan. That made me hit the dirt sheets to find out more. The second thing I learned was that Vince McMahon verbally undressed his writers and gave the brain trust of the WWE creative team a swift kick in the pants. While the first had more sizzle, the second has more impact.

As far as CM Punk and the fans go, sucks that the guy got hit, but why didn’t he do anything to stop the mob of fans from pushing Punk down the stairs? Change the setting for a second. Take the WWE, Wrestling, and Fans out of the equation and look at it for what it was. If a guy is trying to be pushed down the stairs by a handful of people, and you’re standing less than a foot behind the person then isn’t doing nothing just helping those morons push the person down the stairs? It’s like the end of Seinfeld when they watched a guy get mugged but didn’t do anything about it. They went to jail, and this kid tasted the back of Punk’s hand. Justice is justice.

The kid who got hit isn’t pressing charges. Good for him. He didn’t have the balls to standup to the people around him who were trying to physically injure a person for their enjoyment. Maybe next time he’ll grow a pair and not let a guy get kidney punched & pushed down a flight of stairs. When we were kids and we did stupid shit then a smack on the head reminded us to not be an idiot. Seems this fan got exactly that. Had he stepped in and stopped a douchebag from being a douchebag then he wouldn’t have gotten a smack on the head. Lesson learned here: Grow a pair and don’t get smacked like a bitch.

Now onto the bigger news from the week: Vince McMahon is beyond pissed with the creative team, including preparing to diminish the role of his two senior writers and promoting some of the new blood. If you’ve been visiting this website for the past few months then you know I have no love loss for the creative team at World Wrestling Entertainment. They are old, tired, and burnt out. They haven’t produced a meaningful piece of television since maybe RAW 1000, and that really wasn’t their doing. This could be the transfusion of energy that the WWE as a whole needs to get over this stale hump they find themselves in.

It would seem that the WWE is under pressure from NBC to turn around ratings that have been in free fall since the switch to three hours and the beginning of the NFL season. The biggest issue being with the creative team that has the success rate of a drunken Ray Charles tossing darts. They could barely produce content for two hours of RAW and it hasn’t gotten any better by stretching the show to three hours. Some would say that the lack of compelling content also lies at the feet of the talent, which has a big drop off after the top tier of wrestlers on the roster. I believe that problem is also something you can attribute to the current creative team at the WWE.

There are undiscovered gems in the WWE right now. Their developmental system is stockpiled with future stars. Dean Ambrose, Kassius Ohno, Seth Rollins, Bray Wyatt, and Luke Harper are just some of the future talents that the WWE creative team hasn’t unleashed yet. The main reason being that creative has nothing for them on the main show just yet. How can you call yourself creative if you can’t create? That is why the WWE is in its current situation. They have a whole team that can’t do what their name suggests. It’s like football players who can’t play football.

Now the reboot has started. New minds are being put in charge. I wouldn’t be surprised if there was a slew of firings and hirings that take place over the next few weeks. Somebody once told me it is never nice to talk about people losing their jobs. Then again if they did their job right, they wouldn’t be losing it. Nobody has ever a fucked up a situation by doing it correctly.

Since this is an Armchair Booker article then I’m going to lay out how I believe it is done correctly. I’ve never worked for the WWE. I’m pretty sure I’ll never work for the WWE. Not to say I wouldn’t like the job. I just don’t see it in my cards. First off, I’ve never written a sitcom. Second, I still call sports entertainment pro wrestling. In my opinion Sports Entertainment has never pulled a 5 share, but Pro Wrestling has. There is a difference between the two.

To start the WWE needs to build their WrestleMania. I would believe this has happened. It’s creative writing 101. You need to know your destination before you can map out your path. Not to say that the WWE should have the entire show timed out with detailed segments, but a rough idea of the four main events on the show should be hashed out by now. Honestly this should be done before Summer Slam.

Without knowing what you’re building to then what direction are your current shows pushing towards? Without direction you’re drifting. Having your four main events for WrestleMania planned gives you something solid to begin building on. The middle stuff, or filler, can be hashed out later, but these main events need to be what drives the WWE car from day one. If you know you’re doing Cena vs. Rock 2 then Summer Slam & beyond needs to keep that in mind.

I for one would actually stay away from Rock vs. Cena at WrestleMania. The Rock is coming back at Royal Rumble. His initial draw for WrestleMania is being used up by that appearance. Some fans will tune in to see him at Mania, but his real effect will be seen at the Rumble. Unless he is going to return fulltime, then his value depreciates with appearances that close together. He has a high burn rate, and two months apart is too close to be a double draw.

From what I can tell you have The Rock signed on for Mania. You also have Brock Lesnar. Add into the mix The Undertaker, HHH, John Cena, and CM Punk. Those are your drawing six. They will sell the majority of tickets and PPV buys. Daniel Bryan, Sheamus, Randy Orton, and Albert Del Rio are your second tier draw. They will move tickets and buys on their own, but nothing that tips the needle. I for one think by Mania that Bryan could be a draw, but right now he’s stuck in that limbo between the two. That is the ten talents you can build your show on.

To start I would determine what is the best possible true main event to close the show. This is the match that will sell the most and provides true sizzle. To me that takes HHH vs. Brock & Cena vs. Rock out of the picture. These sheep have both been sheared. They’ll push some sales but they no longer have the shine they once had. In fact I wouldn’t do either match on the card.

The Rock is a one match per talent type of wrestler right now. He gets the most bang for his buck when you can give him somebody fresh to feud with. He also needs to win at WrestleMania. It keeps his ego happy. Who is better for the Rock than Daniel Bryan? Bryan can protect Rock’s ring rust plus he has shown he can get over with any gimmick they give him. Rock vs Bryan has some roots in RAW 1000, and could be a solid 9pm hour main event. This is a really hot match that will blow a lot of fans away and is a possible show stealer. This slot on the card is the best place to put show stealers. It also puts a lot of pressure on your closing, or true main event, match.

John Cena is a draw for a select fan base. He has really burned out a good size portion of the fans. His true value is his hard work. He’ll never mail it in. That makes him the perfect bar setter. He should be the talent that is opening the show. He should be the man who says everyone has to be better than that tonight. That’s why I like Randy Orton vs. John Cena to open the show. They are both established talents. They have good matches with each other. Not putting either in a “Main Event” allows for a rehash of their feud. It’s not meant to be a ticket draw, but both have the ability to set the tone for the evening. That is very important for a big show. It might be why I have always considered the first match of a show as the second most important match behind the main event or closing match.

As for HHH, he’s going to wrestle. I just don’t think it should be Brock Lesnar. Their rematch should happen before WrestleMania. I would much rather see him in the ring with an Albert Del Rio. It’s fresh and the angle writes itself. ADR is HHH when he began. He’s a rich pompous ass with tons of talent. They can do a feud based around ADR being a younger HHH. The young lion will prove that the old lion isn’t who he used to be. The old lion will claim the young lion is him without the experience. They’re both good on the mic, and in the ring it should be a good story. I would say this is tailor made for the 7pm Main Event. Nice solid match up to keep building the night on. It will sell tickets.

With Brock free to fight then he needs to be tossing fists with the man who loves to fight, Sheamus. The young Irishman is being primed to be a top draw. He needs a blockbuster feud. The two would work very well together. Sheamus is a good rough and tough baby face. Brock is a great heartless bully. Their physical styles should mesh well together. Placing them as the 8pm Main Event should help protect them from any potholes. It’s the safest main event slot on the show.

That leaves the closer for the show. I for one would be keeping the title on CM Punk. He is a draw. Simply put, if he and John Cena stopped working for the WWE, then the company wouldn’t have a true ticket seller on the roster. He has a built in big match with Royal Rumble coming up. Punk vs. Rock will have an amazing buy rate. I explained a little above.

Personally I think giving Punk the win at the Rumble does a lot more for the WWE than having Rock win. First it establishes Punk as the man. Second it extends a title reign that will be hard to build again. One year plus makes it so that people will want to see if tonight is the night he drops the strap. Third, it allows for a matchup at WrestleMania that will be a true draw: Undertaker vs. CM Punk for the WWE Championship – Streak vs. Streak.

When Mania rolls around the Undertaker has built in buzz. His streak is something of legend. Another big streak is the days that CM Punk has been champion. A matchup that features the immovable object vs. the unstoppable force is always a draw. In this case it is streak vs. streak. If they meet, then one has to end. Will the Undertaker go 20-1, or will CM Punk have his nearly 18 month title reign ended? You’ll have to pay to find out!

Not only are the two names by themselves big draws. Not only are they going to put together an amazing match. They have the mystery about their finish that adds to the fire. Nobody truly knows who is going to win, and in today’s era of dirt sheets that is a rare commodity. It’s the kind of perfect storm that sets WrestleMania sales records.

The CM Punk vs. Undertaker WrestleMania match is something I have thought hard about. I actually have a creative writing mock-up of the feud. I will be putting that out in the next few days. Check back for the details on that. If I was booking it I would do something that no fan was expecting.

These five matches are the loose skeleton that the WWE can use to build their WrestleMania. There is a solid opener, and four top notch main events. The closing match is a draw that pulls from a variety of angles. This sets the table for the rest of the year, and allows for the WWE to begin pushing toward this end result. As I said earlier, they’ll have a destination and now they can map out the path. Just never forget, it’s all about Wrestlemania.

Night of Champions: Why I Didn’t Buy

WWE’s Night of Champions is in the books. I can’t really review it because I never saw it. I instead decided to watch the 49ers destroy the Lions. Even if NFL football wasn’t on, I probably still wouldn’t have bought this PPV. It was one match and it had all the stink of being an angle driven PPV.

The WWE rumor mill has been really pushing the Hell in a Cell PPV that is coming down the pipe. First there was the leaked poster for CM Punk as the devil at Hell in a Cell. Then there was a small tease that HHH vs. Brock Lesnar might happen in the cell. Finally, Paul Heyman has been hyping the shit out of Punk’s big October release of his DVD. This all made me feel that this PPV was going to be more about putting heat on the next show than putting asses in the seats for this one. It was like a July show for an indie promotion.

In Indie wrestling the toughest months to promote are between Memorial Day and Labor Day. Kids are out of school and that leads to family vacations, which means extra cash for wrasslin’ tickets is now tied up into the vacation fund. In most places it is really nice outside so you lose out to the weather. Finally the summer leads to a lot of competition from carnivals, fairs, movies, etc. No indie show will ever beat out going to see The Dark Knight Rises or stuffing your face with an elephant ear before puking on the tilt-a-whirl.

So when you’re promoting in the summer you run on a tight roster to cut down on expenses. You also use these shows to push storylines that will become ticket sellers in late September/early October. You will have your hardcore fans that come to shows no matter the season. You’ll get a couple of fringe fans who might have a favorite wrestler or nothing better to do. You won’t get the same house you will get once the temperature drops in November.

It’s why you see a lot of tournaments in the summer. It’s a great gimmick to create short term interest that can set the table for future angles or feuds while saving your promotion money. Promotions having 8 guys wrestling in 7 total matches plus a special attraction match helps stretch the budget that is limited. That is what Night of Champions was. It helped the WWE remind everyone about their champions and it let them sell more buys/tickets for their next PPV, Hell in a Cell.

When it comes to the finish of the show I am not bothered by it because I didn’t pay for it. I like the finish for John Cena vs. CM Punk. I have always liked the “Crappy German Suplex leads to both shoulders being down” angle. The under 20 crowd probably doesn’t remember this old 90’s angle. Hell I am even having trouble remembering when I last saw it, but I know I have. I think it involved Bret Hart. Not really sure. The fact is that when you have new fans who really only know the post-attitude era WWE then all things old are new again. Sorry older fans, welcome to being outside of the money demo.

If you paid for it, and hated it, then it’s your fault for not looking at this card and recognizing all the red flags that this PPV had. The under card was barely a step above Shotgun Saturday Night quality. The main event was being played off as not the finish to a feud, but merely a stepping stone. It was a rushed pay per view with almost a complete lack of promotion. I don’t even know if people working for the WWE knew it was taking place.

So now it’s Monday and you’ve got to get over it. The Main Event was a draw. Flair and Steamboat had a ton of draws. If you’re a fan of good wrestling then be excited for this because it is a feud that is being developed. Punk says he deserves respect. Cena believes he should be champ. Paul Heyman is lurking in the shadows. Now there is going to be a nasty cell match between the two. It’s all coming together for what should be a very good show, too bad you had to pay to watch the angle & not the match. I will ask, “Wasn’t the actual match before the draw pretty entertaining?” From my twitter feed, I would say “Yes”. That should be worth something, just not 40 bucks (54 in HD).

Tonight will tell a lot about the plans for the WWE. They will set the table for the cell, but also they will begin the build for Survivor Series. Will this next PPV be another rung in the ladder for this well planned out feud, or will it be the blow off match that catapults CM Punk or John Cena into their next match up in January with The Rock?

Personally I think this won’t be their last singles match. I think this match will end with Brock Lesnar getting involved. I’m even calling a “Lesnar rips the cage door off” spot. Either that or a group of “Heyman Guys” are going to come help Punk. This will lead to a Team Punk vs. Team Cena match at Survivor Series. If the WWE is truly booking for the long term then make the SS match a winner picks the stip for the December PPV. Team Cena wins and we get the blow off in December that leads the champ in 2013 with tons of heat for The Rock in January.

That is a very loose booking strategy but it might be the future for the rest of 2012. Then again, as usual, I could be wrong. Cena could win at Hell in a Cell and nothing happens at Survivor Series. It all hinges on tonight. The price on RAW is free (kinda) and I’m willing to buy the WWE right now at that price.

Monday Night RAW: I'm A Paul Heyman Guy

I want to start off by wishing Jerry “The King” Lawler a speedy recovery from his heart attack. I still remember when I was 19 and I got the call that my dad had been rushed to the hospital for an emergency quadruple bypass.  It’s a long road to full recovery, but if anyone can win this fight it is the king.

Also I want to recognize all those who lost their lives, or their loved ones, on this day eleven years ago when a group of religious zealots acted like cowards by flying two planes into the towers, another into the pentagon, and brave Americans made sure a fourth never made it to its destination. I woke up that morning late for class at college. I rushed to get there without knowing what had happened. I got to class and I was the only person there. This was before smart phones and Facebook. I waited for a half hour for people to show up but nobody did. So I walked out of class and noticed nobody was on campus. I poked my head into the lounge and saw a large group crowded around the TV. That’s when I learned about the attacks.

I later that day got a job delivering pizzas. I dropped out of college, and got back into pro wrestling. I decided that college could wait because I had a dream to be a wrestler, and 9/11 proved to me that at any moment your time to live your dreams can be taken away. I spent five years chasing my dream, making tons of great memories, and then I went back to college to achieve new dreams. To me 9/11 will always be the day my eyes got opened to the reality that the time we have on this planet is shrinking by the moment.

Now on to the lighter side of life: Monday Night RAW. Normally I would break down all the different parts of RAW but really this was the CM Punk show. There was some stuff that quickly developed a few undercard matches for Night of Champions this Sunday, but really this PPV is a one match show.

I am a fan of Daniel Bryan and Kane being a tag team. I like that they are doing the reluctant partners storyline. I have a feeling they become tag champions this Sunday. For a division that has been left to drift, this could be a blessing. I also like them using the choke slam/cannonball as a finisher. Imagine when they come together as team and Bryan runs in asking to be choke slammed. The crowd will pop. Hell, imagine a top rope choke slam bomb by Kane & Bryan. It will be awesome.

Then there was the stupid Sheamus/ADR storyline. Why is a kick banned? It’s a kick. They have dropped the ball on this one. Also the two GMs are stupid. I hope the rumors that they are both getting fired is true. They need to get that whole situation fixed, and quick. Finally Cody looks to be facing Miz for the IC title. Talk about tossing something together quick.

Yeah there is more that happened on RAW but none of it really mattered. It was place holder stuff. Hell I think CM Punk took up almost 40% of RAW last night. He was the opening promo, he was the whole 9 o’clock hour, and he was the show closing promo. Let’s break all of that down.

The opening promo was good. Punk has gone full blown egomaniac. I like that he talks about how if he was the champ back in 97 that he would have sunk the WWE and jumped ship to WCW. Too bad the attitude era wasn’t started in Montreal. Most would say it began when WCW had the NWO and it forced the WWE to go away from campy character wrestling.  So Punk would have just been another part of that need to go extreme. He should just ask Paul Heyman about why ECW was brought in for a few RAWs. Overall the opening segment was good, and did what it needed to set the table for the end of the show.

The 9 o’clock hour was a decent match between Punk and Orton, then an angle tag match between Orton/Lawler & Ziggler/Punk. I love how they are handling the Punk and Heyman “alliance”. Nobody knows why they are together. All we know is that Punk is a Heyman guy. We also know that Brock hates Cena because he lost to him a few months back.

Finally it seems that Punk is going to be champ going into the Royal Rumble. There is a Survivor Series PPV between now and then. Imagine an old school Survivor Series match with Punk & Brock on one team and Cena & Rock on the other; then maybe toss in 6 others talents. I suggest HHH, HBK, and Undertaker on team Cena. The other three for Punk & Brock can be other “Heyman” guys.

Ziggs lost to Orton. Again. Hopefully this means on PPV that Ziggs will finally pick up a win against the Viper. If not then I have no clue what creative is thinking. Their MITB winner shouldn’t be jobbing out to the guy who might not be there next month.

The last part of the show was about trying to get Cena over as the face with the help of Bret Hart. John Cena gave one hell of promo to Punk. The two have a great chemistry in every aspect. By the end the Montreal crowd was very pro Cena. It was a really strong finish to the show and probably sold a lot of people who were on the fence about this PPV.

I also like having Bret Hart punch out CM Punk. Cena makes the original save to pop the crowd, and then Hart is on the defense to block the second attempt. It’s one shot from one of the greatest in the world, and Punk peppers out of the ring. It is the perfect way to handle it because Hart shouldn’t be able to hang with the champ, but a good shot to the jaw works at being believable.

This Sunday will be interesting. Traditionally on these middle of the road PPVs, the guy standing tall on the last RAW is the guy losing the match. By that math it would be CM Punk who slithers out after Sunday night. I think there will be more Heyman interaction. I also think the Boston crowd will be a great crowd for this match. It may be the most pro-Cena crowd the WWE has.

Monday Night RAW hasn’t been knocking it out of the park. Last week was a place holder besides the very end segment. This week it was all about Punk. Once this PPV is over, and we move on to Hell in a Cell, I would believe things should pick up to compete with Monday Night Football. If the WWE waits until their build for Survivor Series, then it could be too late. Then again next Monday is coming together as a can’t miss show because something big is brewing for this Sunday. When it comes to good RAWs, I find it’s the mystery that sells the best. That is why I’m a Paul Heyman guy.  

Monday Night RAW: When 3 Hours Becomes 1

I didn’t get to watch RAW live last night, but before going to bed I decided to DVR through the 3 hours. It’s sad when I can get through the whole episode in an hour, and know I never missed a thing. The fact is that World Wrestling Entertainment is getting ready for an international tour, and next Monday is a holiday show, so the WWE is in a holding pattern until September 10^th. The matches this week were nothing bigger than anything I would see on WWE Superstars. Even John Cena vs. The Miz, a former WrestleMania main event, didn’t have a big match feel.

I for one am a big fan of the mini-feud between CM Punk and Jerry Lawler. Last night it was fumbled a little bit. Why won’t Jerry Lawler man up right away and why does he need an hour to think about it? I was all for the CM Punk “apology” and how he ran down Lawler. When Punk walked away I expected Lawler to lay out the champ with a cheap shot.

In fact it would have been better than waiting on Lawler to make a decision. They just have Punk do his fake apology and turn his back on Lawler. Then Jerry smacks Punk in the back of the head and tosses him from the ring. Punk storms off and in a backstage interview he challenges Lawler for later. Finally Lawler answers his challenge with a “Hell Yes” instead of the whimper he gave last night.

There were a lot of “eh” matches. Ryback, Layla, Truth, Santino, and Clay were all angle matches. None of these matches moved the needle. Ryback has a sloppy match with Swagger, who should be begging for his release. Layla got a win where the focus was on Vickie on the outside. Santino and his cobra have hormones for a chick with a hand. Clay teams with Sin Cara to get some rub by beating Rhodes & protecting Sandow. Finally Truth gets a win because the WWE wants to further the Bryan anger management angle. That’s like 90 minutes of stuff in a paragraph. See how fast you can DVR through three hours.

I did enjoy the Bryan anger management segments. They are campy and cheesy. I laughed at the Kane part because his character is that quirky. A tip of the cap to his morbid past, and Pete Rose was a big pop. I am interested to see where all this goes down the line. I wonder if it will be a bonding moment for Bryan and Kane? Maybe a future tag team?

Cena and Miz was good. These two have good chemistry. It was simply a match to keep Cena top of mind. The IC Champ is now just a glorified enhancement talent. The WWE just had to remind us that Cena is still around and he is gunning for Punk. Don’t everyone cheer at once.

The HHH segments were good at selling the end of his career. I enjoy the walk down memory lane. He is one of the best in ring performers in the history of the business, and to steal a sports term, a sure fire first ballot hall of famer. His speech was long, but if it is supposed to be his last one, then it should be that long.

Now I don’t for one second believe that he is totally done. As I said yesterday, HHH won’t go out crying. He’ll go out being carried from the ring. He is King Arthur in his mind, and Arthur doesn’t die on his knees, but carried out on his shield. I think they’ll save the dates in the Brock contract, and maybe use HBK to lure HHH out of retirement. How about HBK vs. Brock at Survivor Series or the Royal Rumble, which leads to Brock vs. HHH in a blow off match at WrestleMania? It would be a nice addition to a card that looks to have Rock vs. Cena, and possibly Punk vs. Taker.  That is three big matches to sell your 8PM, 9PM, and 10PM hours on the biggest show of the year.

Again Ziggler gets his teeth kicked in, and guess what Randy Orton stands tall. Yes it was Sheamus kicking in his teeth, but of the four men in that tag match, it is Orton who should be looking at the lights. Del Rio is your current #1 contender. Sheamus is your World champion. Ziggler is your money in the bank holder. Orton is fresh off suspension for his second drug violation and about to leave again to film a movie. Which one do you think should be losing? Yeah not Ziggler. Crowd liked it, but Milwaukee isn’t known for their intelligence.

The crowd showed their lack of care during the main event. Jerry Lawler and Punk are facing each other in a cage match, and you could hear a pin drop in that building. Maybe the crowd was tired from three hours of subpar wrestling. The match was limited because Punk at any time could destroy Lawler. He played the cocky heel, including the free shot to begin.

I liked how the match played out because there was a story involved in there. Now most people in the crowd and watching at home don’t really understand how big a deal Jerry Lawler was. They know the puppy loving immature commentator and not the king of Memphis wrestling. It showed last night.

The end was the best part with Punk dismantling Lawler as he demanded respect. He really took a turn towards the dark side. Cena comes out and forgets he can climb a cage, so Lawler takes a few more minutes of a beating. The cage gets raised and Punk walks off with an evil grin on his face. Purpose served even if the crowd didn’t care for the first 90% of it.

Should be interesting to see how next week is handled in Chicago. Punk will be a conquering hero in his hometown. I would assume they will play up the hometown angle for Night of Champions. I’ll put my money on a six man tag next week. It’s the crutch match for WWE creative when they don’t want to really advance a storyline. I don’t think Lawler gets involved because they might sell him being injured after the attack. Then again having him be part of team Cena in a six man would make sense.

Finally, I would think a stipulation is going to be added to the match between Cena and Punk at the PPV. I still say a handshake or respect match but with the loser calling the winner, “The Best in The World” after the match. In Boston that would be some serious heel heat if Cena had to say it to Punk.

It was a quick week this week. I expect the same next week. That means the September 10^th show has to be a HUGE event to help cover the coasting the WWE is doing. If not then I might coast past buying Night of Champions.

Monday Night RAW: Respect This!

Does the WWE creative team go out drinking after a good PPV and then wake up forgetting they have to write a 3 hour RAW? It seems that way with all the mish mash crap tossed against the wall. They came off a strong showing at Summer Slam and then on Monday night delivered the best episode of Sunday Night HEAT they could come up with. It would seem that after getting people hooked with a good PPV, you would want to follow that up with a blockbuster RAW. If you’re going to take a week off then maybe choosing any night but the next night would be a good idea.

Brock and Paul come out to close the book on their time here in the WWE. Heyman again does a great job on the mic. He made HHH seem like a big deal and that made Brock manhandling him look like an even bigger victory. If you’re learning how to cut promos then Paul Heyman’s promos from this whole run in the WWE are a must watch. He shows how it is done. Only thing that sucks is that now he and Brock are done until Survivor Series or maybe even the Royal Rumble. It is hard to build on a guy with that much of gap between appearances. I mean no person in your main event from Summer Slam is on your current active roster.

The six man is back! You know creative is punting the ball when they pull out the six man tag to do a storyline crossover. The Prime Time Players looked good but they lost on the PPV, and now they lost on RAW. How are they supposed to be a threat to the champs when they are losing more than winning? You can do this with established tag teams, but not one that is still fresh in the minds of the audience. It’s booking 101. I know Rhodes took the pin, but the team lost, and that counts for something.

David Otunga is back and guess what he’s gonna get squashed. Did somebody write that on the napkin at Denny’s after the post Summer Slam bender? Two segments down in one retreaded storyline. Oh and they are really pushing AJ Lee tonight. I guess they are trying to see the burn rate on her character. That’s crazy!

Let’s just put all the squash matches into one paragraph. Ryback kills another jobber tag team, but now Jinder Mahal is getting involved. The whole first hour was an old episode of Velocity. Where’s Funaki? Then later on Otunga gets mauled by Big Show. They used this to build Show’s heat back up after the loss. Wonder where he goes now that Punk and Cena are dancing by themselves? And finally the Divas battle royal, what that wasn’t a squash match? I’m pretty sure that match squashed the ratings. Nothing good can be said about it.

Albert Del Rio is the #1 heel on Smackdown. He is challenging for the World title. He is easily a top tier star. He also joins the list of top guys who job out to Randy “Puff Puff Pass” Orton. I get that Sheamus distracted Del Rio and that led to an RKO, but after getting screwed last night, this just makes his character look weak. This was the first “main event” of the show, and yet it elevates the wrong guy. Sheamus is the heel … oh no he’s just the cheating good guy!

Orton is coming off a suspension, and about to leave to film a movie, maybe the WWE could prove a point and use him to build a few heels. A win over him by ADR, Daniel Bryan, or Ziggler could really catapult those men in the eyes of the audience. Plus it proves a point to the locker room that if you fail your second drug test that you will have to prove your worth when you come back from a sixty day suspension. Again I will state Orton should blaze a fat Cheech & Chong blunt on the way to the ring because he is untouchable in this company.

A bright spot is the Sandow and Brodus Clay feud. It has been handled really well. Sandow is great at getting under the fan’s skin. He takes a good beating from Clay, but he steals a win. When Brodus finally beats Sandow it will pop the crowd. People will pay money to watch Damien Sandow get his teeth kicked in. I look forward to seeing if they let this continue to build up or if they blow it by giving Clay a pin in a tag match. He shouldn’t beat Sandow in any match until after the next PPV. Clay should get close, but always come up short due to some heinous cheating by Sandow. I also popped for the fist full of tights. Old school is cool.

The Shawn Michaels promo was really good. It was just too low on energy. He is trying to sell this “End of HHH” story and the energy on the show was so low already that this almost stopped the show. I personally would have saved this until after Ziggler vs. Jericho so that the audience was pumped up from a good match. It could have had a bigger impact. Still it was a great promo, but again it was wasting time on guys who won’t be in the WWE picture until November at the earliest.

The tag match between the former enemies turned partners was ok. I don’t like the no finish. Ryder could have lost the match for his team and then Kane could have abused him. It would have achieved the same goal, and it would have given Kane a better reason than a slap in the face for losing his mind. Maybe have Bryan beat Ryder then slap Kane. Again same result but it gives a cleaner finish. It’s the little things.

I loved the Ziggler vs. Jericho match. It was sloppy in a few areas, and I am glad Y2J is ok after the botched Frankensteiner spot. These two have a really good chemistry in the ring. Also watching them is like watching a man wrestle a younger version of himself. It’s too bad Jericho has to go tour with Fozzy because this could have been a really good feud over the next few months. The end helped elevate Ziggler, and Y2J’s attack left the door open for a rubber match down the road. WrestleMania? I hope so!

I was hoping CM Punk would name Jerry Lawler as the #1 contender for the WWE title. I’m an old school Andy Kaufman/ Jerry Lawler fan. While the match wouldn’t have been a classic due to Lawler’s age, I believe the two of them could put something special on. It would be funny that back then Kaufman was the guy limited in the ring and Lawler carried him, but now it would be Lawler who is limited and Punk who carries him. In wrestling everything comes full circle.

Cena cut one hell of promo. Normally I would take issue with a guy passing up a title shot, but this plays into the Cena character. He values his integrity more than a title. He preaches to his fans to believe in themselves and he can’t do that if he sells out for a title shot. I really hope this leads to a “respect” match at night of champions where the loser has to shake the winner’s hand, or in this case say that other man is “the best in the world”. If Punk beats Cena in his hometown that could be a great scene with a hyped up crowd. Especially if Punk cheats to win.

The afterwards where Punk pivots back to Lawler was nicely done because he doesn’t waste time on Cena. He wants his respect. Cena won’t give it to him, so Lawler must. This looks to be setting up a match between Lawler and Punk on RAW. I like that a lot. The kick and stare was a good way to end RAW. Would have liked to see AJ come out to address Punk, but I guess she forgot she was GM.

This three hours of RAW dragged a lot. Maybe it was because six hours of wrestling in a 27 hour period is too much. I don’t think that is true if there is good wrestling. I just think when you have a strong show like Summer Slam and then follow it up with a subpar RAW that the weakness becomes more glaring with such a close comparison. Summer Slam was fresh in people’s minds and that meant RAW had to live up to that standard, which it didn’t.

I’m looking forward to next week. There is a lot of talent that has been moved off the WWE roster. Brock, Heyman, HHH, HBK, and Y2J are all gone. Ziggler looks to be moving back to Smackdown as he still is their MITB holder. If he stays on RAW I would hope they use RKO to get him over with the fans. Wade Barrett should fill some of the void, but who does he feud with? Miz?

Here’s to hoping some new talent gets called up as Night of Champions is in a few weeks. We need better tag teams. We need a true challenger for both the IC and US titles. Plus Punk is mini-feuding with Lawler as Cena waits in the wings meaning that match could be a last second announcement. That’s a lot of holes to fill in three weeks. Wasting a week like last night doesn’t do much to help creative fill those holes, it just creates more.

Summer Slam: Breaking New Ground

Summer Slam turned 25 last night with a solid showing by the WWE roster. Every year I look forward to this pay per view as it officially kicks off the WWE “season”. If you look at the WWE like a sport then the time between Summer Slam and WrestleMania is the official season of pro wrestling. I would say from now to Survivor Series is the first half, the second half ending at Royal Rumble, and finally after that until WrestleMania is the playoffs. It’s wrestling season once again.

I was a big fan of what happened last night at Summer Slam. There are some internet writers who bashed the show because they never had high hopes for it in the first place. I found it a very entertaining watch from beginning to end. It might not have had the big shocker moment or a true swerve of the audience, but the wrestling was top notch & the finishes played into a grander plan for the future of the company.

The future for Antonio Cesaro is bright. The former Ring of Honor stand out has been laying low on Smackdown. Last night he jumped into the fray when he captured the United States championship from Santino. This is a good thing for all involved.

Cesaro is a gifted wrestler with size and speed, who can do more in the ring than be just a one trick pony like Santino. Not to mention he loves Starbucks coffee and is very European. Santino is very good at comedy and he has a knack for getting over with the WWE audience. He doesn’t need the title to help him, and there isn’t much he could do to help the title. Getting it off his waist and onto Cesaro makes sense to help expand the roster as Santino can do his shtick and Cesaro can begin rebuilding the US title as a legit championship. Also the rumor that he will turn the title into the European title is great. It should garner lots of heat when he bashes the US championship. Also Aksana isn’t a bad thing to have on TV either.

Ziggler and Jericho did an amazing job kicking off the PPV. They are both gifted wrestlers. Their back and forth through the match had the ending in doubt the whole time. Vickie gets great reactions from the crowd, but I think she is being wasted with Ziggler. He, unlike Brock Lesnar, can do all his talking and all his walking without a mouth piece.

If this was Jericho’s last match of the year, as he goes on tour with Fozzy, then he went out on a high note. As Kofi Kingston said on Twitter, these two tore the house down. I don’t know if I agree with Jericho winning as Ziggler could do more with the win, but maybe this means a rematch. In that case, we’re all winners.

No better person to follow that match than Daniel Bryan. He took the energy of the crowd and kicked it into high gear. With just one word he gets the whole place whipped up into a frenzy. He again made Kane look better than he is. Something I could probably write for every Bryan match. His win came out of nowhere as I, like many, thought he would continue to get buried. Giving him the win does a lot for his character and I expect him to start moving up the card building new baby faces to feed to CM Punk. I just don’t know who those people could or will be.

The aftermath with Kane was good to build a bridge to RAW. Kane continues to be in a revolving cycle with his character as this angry monster that shows signs of good, only to become angry again. Will he begin to feud with AJ? Will he and Bryan end up teaming together against her? Will Kane learn Zen? (Ok maybe that’s a stretch). These are good questions to have unanswered because they create interest in a character that hasn’t been fresh for almost a decade. Thumbs up to Kane for this aftermath, and for tossing Josh Mathews like a rag doll.

Miz and Mysterio had a good back and forth match. It was mostly to get the easy pop of Mysterio in LA and to get Miz some credit as he builds his IC title run. They told a nice story with a couple of good new moves from Miz. Mysterio is still good in all his classic spots. They both worked a good match and it did all it was supposed to do. Nothing special, but nothing idiotic, which is all you can ask from a middle card match. It just kept the flow of the show on a good roll.

Sheamus and Albert Del Rio was fun until the finish. I am a big fan of Del Rio’s ring work and character. He comes off as a big timer. Sheamus is good as the bruiser. I still am not sold on him being a big time talent as I see him as more of a talent who is reliant on his opponent to have a good match like a John Cena. I wouldn’t call his World title run memorable.

The end with the shoe and the foot on the rope where Sheamus does the heel move while ADR complains that he got legit screwed doesn’t sit well with me. Del Rio is the new ultra heel, yet he is the one coming off as the man getting screwed. Sheamus is the good guy who cheats and steals to get over. It worked for Eddie Guerrero, but not for King Kong Ginger. I really hope that was a hiccup in his character and not something the creative team relies on in the future.

The tag title match was ok. Neither team has done much to stand out. The Prime Time Players don’t deserve to be champions with their recent record against other teams. Kofi and Truth are a nice tag team that can help keep the division afloat while other teams become established. All four men played their roles well, but the lack of pop from the crowd during the hot tag to Truth tells you all you need to know about how far this division has fallen. This was the bathroom break, grab a new beer, and get seconds on pizza match.

I loved the CM Punk, John Cena, and Big Show match. Unless you’re blind, this whole angle has been about Cena and Punk. Yet it was Big Show who really got the rub in this match, as he should since he took a tap out and a pin cover. The early parts with Show just mauling both men made the audience know why he was in this match. He’s the biggest bad ass on the roster. Also the tip of the cap by CM Punk to Bret Hart was nice.

All the early Big Show mauling set up the middle of the match where Punk and Cena trade moves to try and take down the big man. The double suplex by Show is always a cool spot. I also enjoyed the multiple knees by Punk then the failed Bulldog into the big flying leg drop by Cena. Even the end sat well with me because it really played into the story that Punk and Cena have been telling for the past few weeks.

When both Punk and Cena slapped on submission holds on the Big Show at the same time it was a great way to change things up a bit. AJ was going to get involved in this match, and this gave the WWE the chance without having to stretch for it. Now some will argue it should have been just Punk and Cena, but AJ is a new GM, the easiest thing to do is restart the match, and it takes less explaining to the audience because all you need to say is “restart the match”.

Then as Punk tosses Cena out of the ring as John laid out Show with his finisher, it all came together in a great way to have Punk keep the title. Also Cena keeps his momentum from not truly losing. Finally it had the two keep their heat between them because one out did the other. Cena calls Punk lucky, and Punk can talk about Cena needing to respect him. Now they will move on to Boston and the next PPV, where even money says Cena walks out champ in his home town. Let’s hope that isn’t the future.

If Cena got beat by Punk in his hometown, it could do a lot for both of their characters. Punk would be made an instant heel by the crowd for downing their hometown kid. Cena would have hit rock bottom, thus starting the build to winning the Royal Rumble and regaining his honor at WrestleMania. Also Punk is the cover boy for WWE ’13 and has a big DVD coming out in October. Him being champ helps push both of those. That and Punk vs. Rock at Royal Rumble can do a lot to help get Rock over and save Cena/Rock 2 for WrestleMania as the cap off to Cena’s return to glory storyline. None of that can happen if Cena is champ before Mania.

The main event was what I thought it would be. They played it up to be more of a fight than a wrestling match. It was brutal and methodical. Brock Lesnar is just a massive human being and moves like Rey Mysterio. He beat the living crap out of HHH. I really enjoyed the flipping the announce table and using it to jump off spot. Also using Brock’s known gut injury issues was a good touch to bring the beast down.

The start was a little slow but it almost had to be after following the WWE title match. When Lesnar got “injured” things began to pick up. Near the end I thought Lesnar was going to do his second straight job. Having him pop up after taking that second Pedigree and slap on the Kimura made him look really strong. Nobody kicks out of the Pedigree, yet Lesnar takes two and still can snap HHH’s arm.

I think the end had to be done the way it was. HHH had to have his arm broke, and Lesnar needed to reestablish his mean streak. I just wonder where he goes from here after beating HHH. Is a match with HBK in the future? Is HHH coming back in a few months for revenge? Is Brock coming after Punk to face Rock at Rumble? Again these are all unanswered questions that have me tuning into RAW to find out.

When Summer Slam was over I felt that I got a very enjoyable show. It didn’t drag on and there wasn’t a truly bad match on the card. The two main events delivered. Sure I could have bitched about the movie preview and the music performance, but that’s what comes with “entertainment” instead of “wrestling”. In the end the WWE set the table for the rest of the pro wrestling season and new ground has been broken that plants the seeds going into the Rumble and WrestleMania, which is the trademark of a good Summer Slam.

Monday Night RAW: Broken Finish

(courtesy of WWE.com)

Last night was the most enjoyable of the new three hour format. It might be because I am getting used to it being three hours. It could also be that they had more wrestling on the show. Then the end of the show happened, and it came off as a teen drama like Dawson’s Creek or One Tree Hill. Maybe that is because AJ Lee skipping to the ring looks more like a cast member for Pretty Little Liars than the GM of a WWE brand.

I’m a fan of mixing things up. They usually start with a twenty minute promo, but instead they have Show vs. Punk. This was a good match to showcase how much of a threat that Big Show is. He manhandled the WWE champion. Since this was all an angle with Daniel Bryan coming to get involved to set up the tag match later, it was a good use of talent. Show got jobbed out by RKO last week, so Punk does him a favor by taking a whipping this week.

When AJ skipped to the ring among the four was the first time I really noticed how out of place she looks. She doesn’t act serious and comes off like an airhead. As pointed out by Shane Helms on his twitter, it is the reason she wasn’t at the contract signing later in the show, because her action/look sticks out like a sore thumb among the brutes. Turning her into a GM instead of a Vickie Guerrero or Eve, who fit the role better, might have a negative impact on her run in the WWE.

JTG talked trash on twitter. The WWE creative team either told him to do it to get over on the dirt sheets, or they are using it afterwards to deal with the collateral damage. Either way JTG gets to taste the stiffness that is Ryback. His new entrance music is horrible. I hate “Feed Me More”. What a dumb catch phrase. Now we get to wait until somebody answers “Feed Me More” with a knuckle sandwich. Get it. He squashes JTG and people now know to watch their ass on twitter as Cole has a social media orgasm.

The Prime Time Players are already better without AW. It sucks he is out of a job, but even a pro stand up like Daniel Tosh will tell you that rape jokes are tough to pull off. Now AW is going to be a stand up. Can’t wait for that. It’s been my career for five years now. Should be fun to see him realize you can’t just ramble on stage.

Just attacking R-Truth, and doing their best Billy and Chuck impersonation after, did more for the Prime time Players than months of AW talking during their matches. I look forward to seeing where they go from here. The R-Truth match was just to set this up, so Slater is not even an enhancement talent now, he’s a placeholder talent.

Tensai vs. Sin Cara & the Divas match weren’t anything special. I checked on the NFL preseason game during these. Tensai needs to break from his worshipper and get with Vickie Guerrero. In fact having him, the Prime Time Players, and one more talent would be a nice stable for Vickie. Plus then Ziggler could break free for a solo run, or he could be the one and let those guys be his muscle/stooges.

Rowdy Roddy Piper is hit or miss, never in between. Unfortunately last night was a miss. He was trying to get Jericho over with the crowd as a good guy. He ranted about stuff while also trying to get over his Mickey Rourke match from years back. Also his homophobic pink shirt comment didn’t do much as now everybody wears Pink shirts. Just as Pauly D or Robbie E. This segment was a train wreck that went too long, but did lead into a great match.

Ziggler vs. Jericho vs. Miz was an entertaining three way dance. They all worked their butts off and I liked that Ziggler was kept out of most of the match. They told a good story with Jericho trying to show he can win the big one. Miz can really sell. In the end having Ziggler steal the win from Jericho as Vickie distracted the ref was simply amazing stuff. Jericho took out Miz with the walls. Then Ziggler hits his finisher on Y2J. It puts both young guys over, and plays up the “Jericho can’t cut the mustard” storyline. Good stuff, and their match at Summer Slam should be a classic. Especially with it being Jericho’s last match of 2012.

Another great storyline match was the tag between Punk/Cena & Bryan/Show. They really put over the tension between Cena and Punk. They also showed how over Bryan is with his “No” gimmick. That crowd was losing their minds taunting him. I am sure Daniel Bryan goes to the bathroom and shits gold. He protects Show by taking the beating, and the Summer Slam match for the WWE title is set. I hope Bryan beats Kane as he is the glue holding this company together this summer.

Another great moment is the build of Damien Sandow. Christian is now relegated to the cheered face that always gets beat. The announcers talk about his title runs only to prove how good the guy he loses to is. Again I state, was being TNA champion that bad? Funky Brodus comes to the ring and everybody thinks Sandow is going to lose, but swerve is on us. He picks up the duke and for a third straight week rubs it in Clay’s face. Their match at Summer Slam should be good, and Sandow is becoming a money drawing heel because people will pay to watch him get beat up.

I didn’t touch the whole HBK, Lesnar, and HHH angle yet because it was broken. Parts of it I liked, Parts of it I didn’t, and Parts of it were straight from the CW. HBK is scared of Lesnar. His facials are great. He is really helping sell that this man is a monster. This I liked.

HHH isn’t there because he flew commercial. The big wig of a billion dollar company that owns jets with their logo on it didn’t fly on one? Come on man. Why not just say he is stuck in traffic? Why not have him show up only to be called away on business? Anything but a commercial flight is late. This isn’t JTG on the phone, it’s HHH. This I didn’t like.

Paul Heyman was a salesman. He made sure people knew this was going to be brutal. The crowd wasn’t into it because they were in hour 3. So he tosses in a Texans being cowards line and gets them riled up. He is an old pro at this. It brings out HBK and the two together have done more to sell this match than anything Brock & HHH have done together. I really liked this.

Then after it all ended HHH came down to save his little buddy. That’s right the hall of famer, showstopper, and man who took on Taker in a Hell in a Cell, needed HHH to come down to watch his back. One Lesnar = One DX. It makes HBK look weak like he can’t fight his own fights. I get he is retired, but is anyone coming down to stand up for Mick Foley, Stone Cold, or the Rock if they are in a ring with one man? Probably not. This I didn’t like.

Here is where the teen drama kicks in. Heyman sets up HBK by blocking his car with his car. Lesnar comes and drags HBK out of his car. The cameraman gets knocked down and we lose visual but not audio. They have a nasty sound brawl. Then commercial.

We come back from commercial and nobody knows where Lesnar or HBK is. You mean everyone missed a nearly 300 pound man carrying a broken down 240 pound man to the ring with a fat manager yelling behind him? Then HBK gets roughed up by Brock as HHH comes to the ring. Heyman tries to control his man, but oops, he breaks HBKs arm. Then HHH does the stupidest thing yet and challenges Brock to fight him in a ring where his buddy is being attended to by EMTs for a broken arm. Are you gonna fight on top of him? Genius!

It was overbooked drama that made the show feel like it was clunky at the end. The end should have been the contract signing, but we waited around, and everyone knew it was so HBK could get brutalized. Maybe do the contract signing at 10PM, then do the WWE title tag match, and end the show with Lesnar beating the crap out of HBK in the back. Hell, even have him break HBKs arm in the back and then jump in a car driven by Heyman as HHH chases after on foot. It would have flowed together, and it wouldn’t have insulted the WWE title picture by having them go on mid-show.

This show was good. Some of it made me want to see Summer Slam. Jericho vs. Ziggler will be good. I’m even looking forward to the tag match and the Clay/Sandow match. Bryan looks to be hitting a great stride. The WWE title match is intriguing because I really don’t know who is walking out champ between Cena and Punk. It should be Punk, but it seems that his character might be headed towards dropping the title and going full blown dark side.

The Summer Slam main event between HHH and Brock has lost some steam. It will probably be entertaining, but in the end it still hasn’t connected with me. This is more of a match built on name value than storyline value.

When it’s all said and done Summer Slam will fall on how well these two tell a story in the ring, which will rely on Heyman & HBK playing heavy roles.  I’m still betting on a Stephanie smack to Heyman & that HBK will do the whole struggling with tossing in the towel angle much like Rocky did in Rocky 4 when Drago was murdering Apollo. If it goes like that then does that mean HBK vs. Brock at Survivor Series to avenge his friend and get back his reputation after Lesnar made him piss himself on RAW? I leave you with that to think about.

RAW Preview

It's Monday! That means three hours of wrestling. Ok I guess maybe an hour of recaps and videos plus two hours of wrestling. Well maybe an hour of wrestling with recaps, videos, and promos. 30 minutes of wrestling? I hope so.

It's HBK day on RAW tonight, but it might be all off camera for the live Texas crowd. If that happens then it is a blown opportunity by the WWE. I don't care if you can only get HBK in front of a camera to shill his merch, it is always a ratings boost. My fingers are crossed that he gets involved in the Brock Lesnar & HHH feud.

Speaking of the terminator, Brock is going to be in the house. That should mean some kind of live action this week instead of 5 recaps from RAW 1000. Probably only 3 recaps this week. Then again if he appears live this week that will mean 5 recaps next week. Pretty soon this kind of build is going to make me DVR RAW just so I can fast forward through this and watch the commercials. Then again that might be the plan.

I feel like I am going crazy like Daniel Bryan. He continues verbally sparring with AJ Lee, and AJ keeps crushing Bryan with her endless supply of massive monsters. Kane is an anger management therapist, and Charlie Sheen is his buddy. Daniel point on the booking sheet where creative touched you.

Albert Del Rio will continue to tell us he won't wrestle, and then he will wrestle. Makes me believe him when he says he is going to win the World title. Here's an idea ADR, don't wrestle! Do some heelish things like roll out of the ring when bell tolls, and walk out instead of wrestling, or don't come out when your music plays. Maybe even stage a sit in in your nice car in the parking lot. How about having RR get you DQ'd as the bell rings by hitting your opponent with a chair and then the two of you destroy that person. All of these avoid wrestling a match, get you over as a heel, and help you keep your word until Summer Slam. Come on man!

Randy Orton, the viper with a hash pipe, is back! He'll demolish somebody else tonight. I am guessing it is Jack Swagger. He hasn't taken an RKO in months. Must be good for backstage morale that a guy can get strike two and comes back with a bigger push than half the talent that toes the line. If I was an undercard wrestler I would try to give Orton some weed brownies at the catering table.

Finally it is CM Punk feuding with AJ Lee as John Cena continues his feud with Big Show by both facing the champ at Summer Slam in a triple threat match. That is some world class weaving of storylines. I actually like it, especially if it keeps the strap off Cena for a few months. I am still holding out for a Punk vs. Rock match at Royal Rumble. AJ Lee establishing herself against Bryan and Punk might be a good thing down the line, but right now it is a bumpy start. I hope tonight, take 2 of AJ the GM goes better.

Check back tomorrow for a review of tonight's show. I'll be checking it out on DVR, but will try to tweet my live thoughts. That is if I'm not tossing my phone against the wall during the 4th HHH/Brock recap promo.

To keep you calm check out this video prepping for the upcoming CM Punk DVD: